The DBT diary card
A minute a day. How you felt, what you felt like doing, and what you did instead. It turns a week you can only half remember into something you and a therapist can actually look at, and it shows you the thing that is almost impossible to see from the inside: how often you wanted to do something and did not.
How strong was each one today? 0 means not at all, 5 means as strong as it gets. Do it at the end of the day rather than trying to remember later. It takes about a minute.
How I felt today
Things I felt like doing
What I did that helped
With my children
Both together is not a bad day. It is the whole skill.
Your last seven days
Moving to a new phone, or worried about losing this?
Nobody can see this but you. What you write is saved on your own phone or computer, not on our website. We never receive it and there is nothing to sign up for. Use the same browser each day, and print or back up your card so you do not lose it.
You do not have to wait to start
Most people meet a diary card for the first time in a DBT group, and most people wait a long time for a place. You do not need anyone's permission to start one. A few weeks of cards makes a first appointment far more useful, because you turn up with a pattern instead of a summary.
The free pocket guide goes with this
Two printable pages of the most-used tools: what to do in the storm, the repair script for afterwards, grounding for flashbacks, and a boundary that does not explode. Made for the fridge door, not the bookshelf.
I'll send the free guide and the occasional new-book note, gently, never spammily. Unsubscribe any time.
Using the diary card
What is a DBT diary card?
It is the daily record used in DBT, which stands for dialectical behaviour therapy. You score how you felt, note anything you felt a strong urge to do, and tick what you did that helped. It is the thing a DBT therapist asks you to bring, because it turns a week you half remember into something you can both look at.
Do I need to be in DBT to use one?
No. Plenty of people use one while they are waiting for therapy, or alongside a workbook, or just to spot their own patterns. It is a tool, not a prescription, and it is not a replacement for therapy.
Why does it ask about urges?
Because that is what makes the card useful. Wanting to do something and writing it down is not the same as doing it, and seeing that you wanted to and chose something else is one of the most encouraging things this card can show you. If those feelings are strong, please tell someone, not just this page.
What do the four groups of skills mean?
They are the four parts of DBT, and this card uses plain names for them. Noticing what is happening. Getting through a bad moment without making it worse. Taking the heat out of a feeling. Asking for things and saying no. The proper clinical names are shown beside each one, so your therapist knows what you mean.
Is my data private?
Yes. Everything is saved on your own phone or computer, not on our website. We never receive it and there is nothing to sign up for. Print or back up your card to keep a copy, or to take to an appointment.
Why is there a section about my children?
Because these books are written for parents, and because coming back afterwards is the most useful idea in all of them. Losing your temper and never mentioning it again is what hurts children. Losing it and then coming back does not, and it teaches them that love survives a row. Tracking both is often the first time someone realises they repair far more often than they thought.
This card is information, not medical advice, and it does not diagnose or treat anything. If you are struggling right now, Samaritans are free on 116 123, any time, or text SHOUT to 85258. In the US, call or text 988. If your life is in immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E.